Be confident in who you are and what you want from life. At the age of 25, I’m pretty sure of myself. I’ve had lots of good times and lots of bad times, each one shaping me into the woman I am today. When I look in the mirror, I like what I see. Yes, there are bits of my body and parts of my personality I could work on, but I’m genuinely happy with who I am. I also have my career on track, and although it might not be something I do forever, I trust that when the time comes I will work out what my next move will be and I believe I’ll make the right decisions.
Choose to have friends who make you happy and who make you believe life is easy. You won’t manage to be a little ray of sunshine if you are surrounded by little black clouds.
Similarly: clear the clutter: keep the things and people you love the most. Having a home and workspace I have control over means I’ve been able to clear things that no longer serve a practical or sentimental purpose. Getting rid of the clutter has helped me to clear my mind and helps me to relax. Over the past few years, I’ve learnt to be more discerning with the people I call my friends. There are some people in life who you form a friendship with and then it becomes too much like hard work maintaining that friendship. Personally, I struggle to stay friends with someone if I feel I’m always making the effort and getting nothing in return. Likewise for boyfriends; as Caitlin Moran so beautifully put it: “Never love someone who you think you need to mend or who makes you feel like you need to be mended. There are boys out there who look for shining girls. They will stand next to you and say quiet things in your ear that only you can hear and that will slowly drain the joy out of your heart.”
Don’t stress about what people think of you. We could spend our lives worrying about who said what, who might be saying something behind our backs, who’s judging what we wear, who we’re dating and what our jobs are. What’s the point? If you’re happy with who you are and what you’re doing, ignore the haters; do as Taylor Swift does and Shake it off.
It’s controversial, but maintain an element of detachedness. In my dating life, I’m trying to go with the flow more and not stress or plan too much. By keeping my focus on the present, I can enjoy experiences for their current value. I’m trying to take things slower, not rush or plan ahead and let things happen naturally – all in a bid to avoid giving off an air of desperation.
Keep doing what you’re doing until it doesn’t make you happy anymore. If I’m out in the evening and feeling tired or bored, I’ll go home. If When I’m in a relationship that sucks up all my happiness, I call it quits. If I decide my career isn’t the right path for me, I’ll change it.
Remain optimistic. Keep the bigger picture in sight. Happy times pass, but so, too, do sad times.
Smile all the bloody time. Keep turning up your smile and your brightness and people will gravitate towards you to feel happy themselves.