Love and Lust in Lockdown: A Newfound Love

Lockdown has got many of us feeling hot under the collar and frisky between the sheets. To find out how lockdown has impacted our love and lust lives, I’m getting intimate with interviews.

Sophie (female), 31

What is your relationship status? ​

In a long-term relationship – 11 years. Wow, over a decade now. It feels amazing and strange. Familiar yet still so fresh and new.

Describe your love life in one word.

Equal.

Who have you been quarantining with? ​

My partner, best friend, favourite person in the world.

Has the lockdown impacted your sex life, if so – how?

Let’s get personal here: we don’t usually have lots of sex anyway. Our schedules can be very different. He’s a late owl and I’m an early sleeper. So we kind of miss each other but I feel closer to him during this time and have learnt to be more intimate with my affection. I’m not usually a touchy-feely person but I find myself being more open with my hugs and snuggles. But sex hasn’t really changed for us.

Have any of your desires/fantasies changed during the lockdown? ​

Again, not really. We’re just getting more comfortable being in each other’s space and being freer with our bodies and how we are with each other.

Describe your lockdown experience in three words.

Timeless. Simple. Close.

What have you missed the most about normal life? ​

Being able to have a date night. Cinema. Dinner out. This gives us things to connect over. Trying to keep things special can be tricky and after a while – I don’t really dress up nicely or wear makeup because I’m not going anywhere that’s needed. So dressing up for each other has taken a back seat.

What coping mechanisms have you adopted during the lockdown?

A sense of space. Speaking honestly and truthfully about how we are feeling and coping. Taking time just for myself and knowing it’s okay to not want to be in the same space for a while. Work helps as I can escape to a different environment but it’s not the same. Knowing we can be in the same room but completely into our own things and hours can pass and feel great. Being okay not doing anything.

Has the pandemic changed the way you approach love and romantic relationships?​

Yes. I have more appreciation for those around me; for those I care about. For those who I love and may not show it. I’m learning to compromise a little more than usual. And to let things go that don’t matter (which has been a cause for contention before). Finally, there’s communication about everything. Especially as we live in a small space. Knowing what to say, how to say it and if it needs to be said. Learning to communicate and listen effectively. I have come to find myself loving more in all aspects of my life. More emotional towards others and more compassionate towards others. A feeling of wanting to have intimate encounters that are meaningful and true with friends and family. Ultimately, I have loved this time being just us two. I feel closer and more connected than ever before. There are times I just want to run and hide and scream, but then I find myself craving that affection and attention.  I find myself watching what he does with newfound fascination as if I’m learning all about who is again. And I smile. And become full of love. It pours out, I don’t know what to do with it. So much love I just want to eat him up. So I trace his face and smell his smell and settle into this new but old way of living. Every day I wonder how can I love even more than this. And it still keeps on coming.

What are your hopes for love after lockdown?

Keeping this sense of intimacy and private connection just us two. A hidden little life away from others. Hoping we can still have those days of doing absolutely nothing but being in bed, eating and watching WWF.

Photo by Carolyn V on Unsplash


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