Type “kink in pregnancy” into a search engine and you’ll mainly find medical articles about a physical kink in the ureter during pregnancy or results (that are mainly porn) about pregnancy fetishes. There are only a handful of articles covering how to explore kinky sex, like BDSM, when pregnant.

At first, I was surprised – but why? Pregnant bodies signify youth and fertility, two qualities highly revered by most. Women’s bodies in general have always been fetishised, perhaps more so when flirting with the taboo (is a pregnant body too delicate to be penetrated? Is it appropriate for a pregnant woman to enjoy sex?). Heaven forbid a woman continues to explore her sexual fantasies whilst growing a baby…

A fluctuating sex drive?

One common pregnancy symptom is a change in sex drive but “change” doesn’t necessarily mean “reduction”. And throughout pregnancy, a woman’s interest in sex can shift as her body changes.

If you find yourself feeling rather randy when you’re pregnant, you might be wondering “is it safe to have sex when pregnant?” This isn’t a blog post about the safety of sex during pregnancy – there is loads of content about this all over the internet. TLDR: Unless your doctor or midwife says otherwise, sex in pregnancy is fine. In fact, it can help with some pregnancy symptoms – you just might need to play around with positions if some are uncomfortable and be cautious as your due date approaches. Instead, keep reading to find out how to explore kink, bondage and S&M during pregnancy.

Safety first

Before you dive back into your tried-and-tested bondage pursuits, take a moment to consider that your body has changed. Your belly has physically enlarged, you may not be as mobile as you were prior to pregnancy, your pain threshold may be different, you might feel more emotional than you used to thanks to the surge of hormones and so your limits may have shifted without you knowing.

Bondage positions when pregnant

As you might expect, some positions should be avoided during pregnancy. Doctors advise against lying flat on your back after the fourth month of pregnancy, so being tied spread-eagled to the bed is a no-no. You also won’t want to be lying on your stomach during pregnancy. Even if you don’t think your belly is that big yet, you might find that even from the first trimester your stomach feels swollen and tender and placing your own body weight (let alone that of your partner, too) is unlikely to feel good. Try not to stay in one position for too long because it can be very uncomfortable. Sadly, if you’re into predicament bondage it’s best to swap out this type of play while you’re expecting.

Restraints when pregnant

As your limits might have changed in pregnancy without you realising, it’s a good idea to keep your mouth free from restraints and gags so you can clearly communicate if something’s not right. (Please remember to be a good BDSM buddy and also communicate when something’s oh-so gooood.)

Don’t wrap any restraints, such as rope, around your stomach. If your boobs are sore, steer clear of them and if you can’t stand the thought of your nipples being touched, keep those nipple clamps firmly in your sex box.

Impact play when pregnant

Even when you’re not expecting, you shouldn’t be whipping the lower back or stomach area during BDSM play because this is where your vital organs are located. However, if this has been an element of your practice, stop impact play on these parts of your body during pregnancy.

Choking when pregnant

Erotic asphyxiation (choking) is a dangerous BDSM act but many people choose to engage in it nonetheless. If you’re currently expecting, don’t say yes to choking and be clear with your partner that you’d like to remove this from your BDSM repertoire for the time being. Risking cutting off your oxygen supply puts your baby’s oxygen supply in jeopardy, too. It’s not worth it for a heady orgasm – seek this level of pleasure in other ways.

The bottom line

Exploring BDSM and kinky sex when pregnant can be a fun way to connect with your partner and continue to feel sexy and sexual during pregnant. With a few moderations, there’s no reason why you can’t continue being a saucy little minx and a sexy mama simultaneously!

Photo by João Paulo de Souza Oliveira on Pexels