It’s Friday afternoon and I’m messaging a guy I’ve been chatting with for a while. We haven’t met but he’s obsessed with me being a sex writer. Sometimes, our conversation feels like death by questions, but when other conversations are dragging, I can rely on having a message from this guy.

As I’m typing my reply, a couple “ping” me. They’re both attractive though I wonder if she’s really the one with control of the account.

My mind wanders to the guy I’ve been having hot, casual sex with. Right now, he’s sitting on the train from Manchester to Brighton to share his evening with me.

This is dating apps at their best. The pinnacle of online dating. The Single Life couples vicariously want to live.

Or so I think. In reality, I’m messaging multiple people before embarking on meaningless sex. I’m having my cake and eating it too. There’s a niggling feeling this is rather depressing.

This was two and a half years ago – before I met Prince Charming on Bumble and had a baby with him. And while I’ve been off the apps for a few years, it seems likely that 2025 will see the end of major dating apps. Or at least the iterations that have made them household names for the past two decades.

The rise of dating apps

First, a snapshot of online dating:

• 1995: Match.com
• 2000: eHarmony
• 2003: PlentyOfFish
• 2004: OkCupid
• 2006: Badoo

In 2009, the first dating app appeared: Grindr – focusing on gay, bi and trans people. Three years later, in 2012, Tinder burst onto the app scene and straight, single Millenials loved it. (As of June 2024, Tinder is still the most downloaded dating app in the world. )

Hinge and Pure entered app stores in 2013 and Bumble joined the market in 2014, promising to put women in control. In 2016, Feeld joined the party, followed by Thursday in 2021.

Re-shaping for Gen Z

Global downloads of dating apps have declined since 2019, partly because their user base has changed.

Dating apps were created with single Millenials in mind. When Tinder was born, Millennials were between 16 and 31 years old, but now they’re between 29 and 44. Millennials are settling down or ageing out of dating app use. So it’s no surprise that adults under 30 are almost twice as likely as adults over 30 to use dating apps.

With the user majority shifting to Gen Z (currently between 13 and 28 years old), apps must cater to a new audience.

Gen Z prioritises their mental health

These days, young people harbour no obligation to reply to every person and every message. If they’re suffering from dating app fatigue, they delete the apps and meet people in real life.

Authenticity is also a big deal amongst Gen Z. Time-wasters go to the back of the line, while people showing vulnerability jump ahead.

Gen Z prefer IRL dating

Compared with other generations, Gen Z is also more likely to form relationships offline. They meet at social events (keen to make up for lost years during Covid), via friends, at work and while pursuing hobbies. And speed- and blind-dating are back on the table.

Will dating apps go away? Perhaps eventually, but for now, they’re evolving.

Some apps have harnessed the return to traditional dating:

• Last month, Thursday announced its pivot to a hub for dating events
• Evntful connects singletons with similar interests and synced schedules!

Gen Z don’t shag about

Celibacy is in, shagging around is out – at least according to Gen Z, who’s having less sex than their parents did at their age.

Where does this leave hook-up apps? Will dating apps for casual sex disappear from the market? It’s unlikely but there might be more distinct audience characteristics between people downloading dating apps for relationships versus apps for casual encounters.

Let’s see what 2025 brings…

Photo by Julio Lopez on Pexels